#MeToo

To stay silent at this point almost seems criminal. The Kavanaugh hearings are making me want to say the “F” word, over and over and over again, and I haven’t said it for 59 days. Although I didn’t have the stomach to watch the questioning of Dr. Ford and Judge Kavanaugh by the Senate Judiciary Committee in it’s entirety yesterday, I have followed everyone’s comments on all the social media outlets. I am pissed off.

I very rarely discuss politics. I have always believed I have the right to vote and support any candidate I choose, for any reason. And so does everybody else. I won’t debate with you. I won’t try to change your mind. I won’t ask you who you are going to vote for. I usually know where all my friends and family stand and I’m OK with that. Some of the people I love the most are die-hard Republicans. I can disagree with someone without getting into a screaming match or disrespecting them.

This supreme court nomination process has made me question the very future of this country. I have sat back and watched the crazy interactions and totally ignorant comments on Facebook & Twitter, while trying to pick up my jaw from the floor. I have seen the IQ of Americans drop right before my eyes.

Now it’s my turn. This is my space, and like everyone else, my opinion is my right. This is still America, for now.

You want to know why so many victims of rape and sexual assault never report the crime? Because as traumatic, scary and violent the actual act may have been, it can’t compare to what could happen if they tell anyone. Just take a look at the crucifixion of Dr. Ford. Look how the Republicans have tried to shame her and butcher her character. They turned her into a victim again. I’m just appalled. 

I’m not going to tell my story. It’s not much different than hundreds of other victims. Yet, too many woman I know tell it. I only told my story once. I told my mother. But I have listened to too many of my girlfriends talk about what happened to them. Some of them can talk about it easily and some have cried every time it is mentioned. There is absolutely no “right” way to handle this. I was lucky enough that my brain has allowed me to store that night away in the back of mind and it only appears occasionally. But I know so many who deal with the aftermath of their trauma every single day. I am lucky. Too many are not.

I am scared for the future of women in this country. We all know how the President and his merry band of Republicans feel about women. We all know every degrading, hurtful and humiliating comment he (and others) have made about women. Yet, the people elected him. Women have had to fight for every right we now have and we had to fight hard. It wasn’t that long ago that wives were basically owned by their husbands, women could not own land or have a bank account and we could not vote. And let’s not forget every where else on the planet where this is still the norm. But that’s a rant for another day.  And I have to mention wage inequality in this country. (At last count women earn 79.6 cents to a man’s dollar for the same job.) 

I’m not here to validate Dr. Ford’s story. Nor am I going to try to disprove it. But the treatment of her by the committee, the media and everyone else with an opinion has burnt me to the core. How many other women have been treated with the same malice, just not in front of the media for everyone to see? We all know the answer and that’s why so many remain silent.

Have some women fabricated rape and assault? We all know that some have. But it’s my opinion that this number is very, very low. And shame on them. 

I’m scared for the future because I don’t know what’s next. Overturning Roe vs. Wade is always in the back of my mind. I don’t think old men should get to decide what I, or any woman, can do with her body. I’m not going to argue morals or religion. I believe in giving women, all women, a choice.

So, after almost never discussing politics, I have wrote my opinion. And now I will count to 10 and get on with my life. And pray for our great country.

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